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Religious Views of Life

Taoism         : Shit happens.

Confucianism : Confucius says, shit happens.

Buddhism      : If shit happens, it isn’t really shit.

Zen               : What is the sound of shit happening?

Hinduism        : This shit happens before.

Islam             : If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

Protestantism : Let shit happen to someone else.

Catholicism    : If shit happens, you deserve it.

Judaism          : Why does this shit always happen to us?

Atheism         : I don’t believe this hit.

Agnosticism   : What is this shit?